Wednesday, April 27, 2005

A Fever on Saturday Night

Things I noticed...

I got roped into watching American Idol for one performance last night and without having watched any other episodes I am going to make a prediction. The fat kid with the horrible NECK beard, and LUDICROUSLY skinny stashe is going to win:
There was a segment on last night's episode where they interviewed his parents who labeled their son as a "regular joe." Give the guy some credit. His face is so chubby that he has trouble opening his eyes and has lost all ability to show expression when he is performing. Of course Simon blasted him at the end with a comment like this: "Pack your bags you portly louse." Paula Abdul wasn't available to comment because she was looking for her Vicodin prescription so MC Skat Kat from the Opposite's Attract video stood in for her : .
Despite being ripped apart by the panel I still believe he is going win because he has something that Record Execs seek: a white man who sings like a black man. Being able to market a big cuddly white guy who can sing like Luther Vandross is a record company's dream.

I was talking to some Scranton University Alumni this past weekend and they revealed to me that John Basedow's nephew attended Scranton and had some interesting things to say about his wax uncle. Apparently Basedow is a total asshole! Am I upset? fact my love for Basedow grows after hearing such news. His nephew mentioned that he makes an ass of himself around the holidays. At thanksgiving he shits on everyone at the dinner table for not being in shape. When someone picks up the gravy boat he lets out a sigh of disgust if he feels they aren't fit enough. When someone asks for seconds he looks at them with a twisted look on his face and quips, "SECONDS?" The only good thing about Basedow and thanksgiving is that he chases down the turkey and kills it with his bare hands before the feast. He then wipes the turkey blood all over his face doesn't wash it off when the family sits down to eat.

Mini Basedow:

In case you forgot this is Basedow:

Pic of Basedow before he ripped through the tsunami:
(That link is long I know, but sooooo worth it)


Van Damme reveals what he really is...a :

The guys at top are shooting estremely close to one another:

Wow...the subliminal sex isn't so subliminal here:

Word to your mother


sammmmmyg said...

This question/answer is great:

"Most embarrassing moment?
I don't have any."

What a complete cop-out on the question...a person that rotund has to have multiple embarrassing moments on a daily basis. Things like getting into the car and honking the horn inadvertantly as his enourmous belly presses up against the steering wheel...or the time his muumuu got caught in the escalator at the mall. I just can't vote for an Idol, let alone an American one at that, that can't be honest or at least laugh at himself. Sorry Kevvy, he'll be gone and back to shaker heights trying to support his kid on his meager waffle house salary in no time at all.

KC said...

He is going to be HUGE...literally and figuratively. Waffle House? Come on DOG...PARTY CITY! how about that line beard and moustache!

ERL said...

AGH!! WHY were you watching american idol in the first place is my question?!?

KC said...

Honestly...I never watch I said I had never seen it before and I saw one person perform and he is the winner. one reality show i watch that i catch shit for....the INFERNO

John Spartan said...

WOW Savol's moustache is amazingly thin. I think it gets thinner every week. I might have to watch the show just so I can see it in action.

jackbrizzity said...

Minnie Hercules freaks me out, he could take down the entire Minnesota Twins organization in one sweeping blow. A little late, but the American NInja poster was sweet

KC said...

Mini-Herc is going to never grow more than 4'7. Working out like that at a young age is as bad as starting to smoke a pack a day at age 6. Savol's pencil thin stash is something to behold no doubt. That dude is out of control.