Sunday, July 10, 2005

When you get what you want but not what you need

Digital Trapeziod Map

AHHHH the movies. I will always be in line for afternoon show of the new blockbuster the day they come out. It's an escape of sorts especially when absolutely no thought has to go into what is being flashed before your eyes. Sometimes I am by myself and other times I go with my buddy who we will call Mikey Pooch. Mikey Pooch is always down to see something shitty at 2 o'clock on a Tuesday afternoon because he hates his job more than you. As you all know the idea well is quite dry these days for the movie studios i.e. :Bewitched...THE MOVIE! Fat Albert...THE MOVIE! Dukes of Hazard...THE MOVIE. Family Matters...the MOVIE! That last one is not real but it will be someday. I know that all media is derived or evolved somehow from other mediums, but have we gotten this lazy? I saw we and not them because we all feed into this stuff believe it or not. Even though we are not racing out to see all of it we still embrace it. Example: All of these new age horror films filled with creepy kids and digitial effects, a have all been done in asian film world. The Ring, Grudge, Dark Water...they have all been made before along with a bunch of other new age horror shit films. The funny thing is....we all fucking know it. These asian imports can be bought just about anywhere. They even have them next to their remakes at the store so you can buy the original and the rip-off/remake. Some of it might part of the recent boom in DVD sales. They are flying off the shelves everywhere so the stuidos are just pumping shit out there. They are making more than the box office and their sales have like tripled in the past year. SOOOO maybe that's why all this shit is being thrown into my freckled face.
ANYWAY...I appreciate the "digital age" of film. I am disgusted though by the overuse of it all. Characters that are completely digitally rendered can take alot from a movie, but they will never stop making them in fact they will one day make this movie....THE SITCOMS.

In the year 2015 they are going to release a film where all the characters are computer generated images. Kind of like SImone in that Al Pacino movie titled SImone http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0258153/ that you and I never saw. The technology will be so advanced in the next ten years that we won't be able to tell the real from the fake, which is scary when you think about it. So they are going to make a movie about all former sitcom characters living in the same neighborhood, but all of these characters are going to be digital because quite simply Rudy just doesn't look the same. So the Cosby's will live next door to the Fresh Prince of Bel Air. Theo and the Fresh Prince will continue to rag on Carlton, who will become friends with Elvin. http://www.imdb.com/gallery/mptv/1367/Mptv/1367/10894_0076.jpg?path=pgallery&path_key=Owens,%20Geoffrey (the dude in the upper right corner) Seinfeld will trade saracastic quips with Alex P. Keaton. Ben from growing Pains will compete with Kramer for attention. And the the witch from Bewitched will race the Flying Nun on a daily basis to impress the Bosom Buddies. Hopefully Urkel will have sex, but not with Laura. He will bone the robot chick from Small Wonder. Will he use his own robot Urkel that we were introduced to in like the 4th season?
They are going to be so "idealess" in the next ten years that this 300 million dollar picture will take 2 years to make and will be released around christmas time because that is a good time for shit like this. And movies are made like this cause creeps like me take time to think about it. I will be in linefor the 3:15 show when the time comes.

8 comments:

Kat said...

I used to get super mad at my mom cause whenever I was watching a movie she would say "I have seen this with different people" and I would be like "shutup mom, this just came out, three days ago" But she was right. They were remakes. But this has gone on forever.

Shakespeare was re-makes, did you know that? He would take plays and stories that already existed and re-do them.

The great Greek Tragedies? re-makes of mythologies and so on.

WE as a species have never been all that clever...

I think that a lot of us in our 20s and 30s are finally old enough to recognize the progenitors.

Adam Siewert said...

Yeah I heard about that fat albert thang!

KC said...

Well I am only 7 years old so I am not yet old enough to recognize progenitors. Everything is derived

fix you said...

i see you got the coldplay CD.

KC said...

I didnt get it, but i know that is a line from one of their songs. I always use lyrics as my titles

Steph said...

LOL, just passing through today. I saw the pic you used for your profile and I HATE that guy on T.V.!!! Too funny.

Anonymous said...

KEvin Coyle you are so sexy I wanna DO YOU nagger

Anonymous said...

hahah

-Pac